AUERBACH CENTER — On the conclusion of Tuesday’s Celtics follow, Joe Mazzulla was requested a few media pickup basketball sport that was scheduled for later within the day on the Auerbach Middle.
“I don’t know break it to you,” Mazzulla informed us reporters. “However you’re not enjoying towards one another — you’re enjoying towards the coaches.”
And, true to his phrase, Mazzulla laced up after Celtics follow concluded — alongside six extraordinarily proficient assistant coaches — prepared for a Celtics Media vs Celtics Coaches full-court basketball sport that was sponsored by the Junior Celtics Academy and New Stability.
Former NBA gamers Phil Pressey and DaSean Butler, in addition to 4 former faculty basketball stars: Fairmont State College’s God Shammgod Jr., Duke College’s Amile Jefferson, Richmond’s Tony Dobbins, and Bucknell’s DJ MacLeay.
I believe you’ll be able to guess who got here out on high.
All of the whereas, Celtics stars watched from up above, a smile plastered throughout Jaylen Brown’s face as the sport progressed. Celtics heart Luke Garza hardly regarded away from the demolition going down on the parquet.
“Anybody wish to do media?” Brown belted down on the reporters after the ultimate buzzer sounded. (I’ll word, Brown did cheer on the media all through the scrimmage. Thanks, Jaylen.)
How Joe Mazzulla and the Celtics coaches destroyed the media
It’s arduous to even describe what went down within the sport. To explain it as a catastrophe for us reporters could be an understatement. The sheer hole in athleticism — pace, dimension, instincts, you title it — felt so insurmountable that I can hardly pinpoint what even went down. I’d love to try a field rating, however the quantity of live-ball turnovers we accrued would most likely make me sick.
What I do know for sure is that the Celtics media conglomerate was so totally outplayed that simply getting the ball previous halfcourt felt like a victory.
A rebound (I obtained one!) felt like a landing.
Hitting the rim on a shot try? Virtually a trigger for celebration.
It felt just like the coaches hardly ever missed, however particular shoutout to participant growth coach God Shammgod Jr, who was completely lights out.
The sport served as an (unneeded) reminder of the ridiculous disparity between us common folks and elite athletes. (Imagine it or not, there have been a number of former faculty basketball gamers amongst us.)
And, it was particularly humbling to do not forget that, as huge because the hole was between the teaching workers and the media, the Celtics gamers themselves are in a complete different stratosphere.
Workforce Media scored 4 factors — shoutout to Forbes’ Bobby Krivitisky and Boston.com’s Khari Thompson for ending their layups — and truthfully, if we performed that sport over 100 instances, the ultimate rating would spherical out to about 57-4 each time.
And, as irritating because it was to not be capable to dribble or convert easy passes, I couldn’t combat the immense feeling of gratitude and pleasure I felt all through the blood tub.
Right here we had been on the Auerbach Middle, residence of the Boston Celtics. Each time I contested a shot or hit the deck diving for a unfastened ball, I reminded myself the place I used to be and who I used to be enjoying towards. A few instances, I picked up Mazzulla himself, only for the hell of it.
As a result of why wouldn’t you wish to guard the Celtics’ head coach?
I fell in love with the sport of basketball after I was 11 years outdated. I at all times sucked at sports activities — tennis, volleyball, dodgeball, observe, you title it. Throughout gymnasium class, I often learn a ebook on a mat within the nook, gossiped with pals, or tried to persuade my gymnasium academics to let me go to the library.
True story, I swear. It wasn’t even as a result of I disliked sports activities; it’s simply no enjoyable being completely horrible at something.
However every part modified the primary day I noticed a basketball undergo the web. It took every part, and I imply every part, to get to the purpose the place I obtained adequate at one sport that I made the highschool basketball staff.
Making the varsity basketball staff was the results of hours on hours of three-point makes an attempt each night time (shoutout to my dad for the late-night assists), coupled with an obsessive ardour for the game that I really consider only a few folks have ever felt.
My extremely mediocre highschool basketball profession stays my most prized accomplishment, it doesn’t matter what I accomplish sooner or later. In my senior 12 months, I used to be on considerably of a heater for about two months. That stretch of basketball nonetheless means every part to me, nearly a decade later.
Typically, I replay my best-ever sport — an 8 three-pointer night time towards our rival college, Newton North — simply because I nonetheless can’t fathom how cool a sense it was for the basket to really really feel as large because the ocean.
I want I had been adequate to play basketball as a job, just like the gamers I cowl. I wasn’t even adequate to play in faculty, a actuality that grew to become troublesome to reckon with as I neared the tip of my senior season (and cried after each sport).
However masking the Celtics and the WNBA shouldn’t be a foul comfort prize. Every single day, I pinch myself on my option to “work” as a result of I nonetheless can’t fathom that “work” means watching basketball, speaking about basketball, and writing about basketball. I’m assured that the gratitude won’t ever fade.
Celtics Coaches vs Celtics Media was most likely probably the most lopsided sport of basketball I’ll ever partake in.
It was additionally the time of my life. I can solely hope we do it once more.
