Issues could appear fairly chaotic nowadays right here in West Greenland, however we’ve received nothing on London, which is within the grip of “E-Bike Mayhem:”
The issue? A strike has introduced London’s tubular-shaped subterranean prepare system to a halt, and now everyone’s combating over Lime bikes:
“Securing a Lime bike on Tuesday morning was nearly as treasured as getting Taylor Swift Eras Tour tickets,” mentioned Barmby, who ultimately did discover a bike—just like the Eras ticket. “I’d say it’s a fantastic week to be the CEO of Lime.”
London’s Tube drivers have been hanging since Sunday over calls for for a shorter working week and higher pay. The strike is predicted to proceed till Friday morning. There was no service on the Underground, which normally hosts 4 million journeys a day.
Shorter working week and higher pay? Ah, to be a public worker… In the true world that’s like strolling into Rivendell and demanding a Homer Hilsen manufactured from crabon. Additionally, I used to be beneath the impression everybody in London had at the least one Brompton, however apparently not. Or perhaps they do however they by no means use them and so once they lastly pulled them out of their closets they couldn’t take care of the educational curve:
Anyway, subsequent you’ll inform me Londoners don’t all put on bowler hats and carry umbrellas and comport themselves in an orderly trend always–oh, wait:
For these fortunate sufficient to discover a bike, a extra daunting problem awaits: navigating London roads. Infamous even at the very best of instances for being unfriendly to cyclists, roads this week have been unruly. Bike lanes, which have quadrupled since 2016, are full of girls in heels and males in fits pedaling their approach via the town.
Taxi driver Alisson Viaria, 33, felt nervous driving across the metropolis with so many new cyclists on the roads. “Most individuals don’t cycle on a regular basis, in order that they’re driving round like loopy,” he mentioned.
Pricey Lord, it’s the mom of all shoals!

Although I admit it’s actually inspiring to see Freds, Bromptonauts, Stunning Godzillas, and e-bikers facet by facet in complete indifference.
Additionally, I witnessed each magnificent shoals and enthusiastic Cat 6-ing in London way back to 2011:

So I’ve little doubt they’ll survive this newest blitz.
In the meantime, right here within the land of alternative and the house of deranged entrepreneurship, anyone’s attempting to reinvent skilled biking once more:

So why isn’t professional biking a mainstream sport now? As a result of there aren’t actually “childhood improvement pathways” for it:
Within the years since LeMond and Armstrong captured home audiences, different sports activities have strengthened and consolidated their maintain on the U.S. market – partly via improved public accessibility and established (usually publicly funded) childhood improvement pathways. Each elementary faculty aged baby is uncovered to and performs quite a lot of “video games” like baseball, soccer, and basketball, whereas monitor and subject is a staple of gymnasium class actions; after-school applications join these kids into teaching, league play, and long-term participation. Compared, secure public areas for teenagers to find bicycle racing – not like a basketball court docket or a multi-use soccer and athletics subject – are nearly non-existent within the U.S. at the moment, save for a only a few velodrome monitor services. And the expense of apparatus wanted for aggressive biking has turn out to be increasingly more of a barrier to participation, usually inserting the game out of attain for kids in much less prosperous households.
That is true, which is why when you’re seeking to develop participation you must give your cash to a program like Star Monitor. However as an alternative they’re attempting to invent a totally new kind of motorcycle racing:
StadioBike is the latest and most promising disruptor for shaking up U.S. biking. Based on its organizers – and demonstrated in a 2024 Las Vegas check occasion that featured Mark Cavendish – it’s a scaled-up model of the (Indiana College) Little 500 racing format made well-known by the Oscar-winning movie, Breaking Away. Occasions might be run on present motorsports racing tracks like these utilized in NASCAR and contested by as much as 30 groups of 5 to seven riders every, relying on the monitor measurement, with two to 3 riders from every group racing on the monitor at any given second. Every group should “substitute” riders for one another on the course a minimal variety of instances by way of a “pit cease” trade throughout the 60 or extra laps of the race. Whereas this will sound straightforward on paper, the format ensures that the tempo will at all times be excessive, push each rider to the restrict of their most energy, and require talent, top-end health, and a calculated technique that’s fairly completely different from street, trac, or criterium racing.
I visited the web site, and whereas they’re endeavoring to “disrupt” and “shake up” professional biking, it’s extra like watching somebody attempting to begin a fireplace with a e-book of matches and a moist log:
Granted, they do promise equal pay for males…

And girls…

Although that’s straightforward to do if everybody’s getting paid like shit.
Additionally they implore you to “assume auto racing…”

“However for biking…”

It is a unhealthy thought for 2 causes. First, everybody understands what a race is. Whether or not it’s vehicles or bikes or bikes or simply merely working it’s pretty self-explanatory. So there’s no motive to convey one other kind of racing into it. They may as effectively say, “It’s like horse racing, solely the horse has two wheels as an alternative of 4 hooves, and pedals as an alternative of stirrups, and it’s not alive.”
Second, the danger of evaluating a motorcycle race to a different much more widespread kind of race is that it immediately makes the bike race appear boring. “Take the triple-digit speeds and uncooked horsepower and sheer visceral pleasure of auto racing after which eliminate it. Now you’ve gotten bike racing!” Not solely that, however they’re really holding the races on auto race tracks, so spectators will know precisely what they’re lacking. It’s like serving alfa sprouts in a McDonald’s french fry container.
It actually does appear astonishing that individuals hold attempting to make professional biking occur in America, and once they do I can solely assume that both they’re attempting to launder cash, or else they’re attempting to spend as a lot cash as shortly as attainable as a result of they’ve simply realized they’re the beneficiaries of a particularly quirky property à la the film “Brewster’s Hundreds of thousands.” In spite of everything, the panorama of American professional biking is plagued by the stays of defunct races, groups, and promoters. Keep in mind Cross Vegas?

Or how concerning the Purple Hook Crit?

And what about Rock Racing?

And that’s not even addressing all of the erstwhile stage races:

Thought sarcastically the game of biking has produced extra US presidents than every other, so there may be that.
However, prefer it or not, with regards to bike racing in America there’s just one form that’s experiencing development, and that’s the “G” phrase:

Don’t neglect to enter that lottery!
And you may even get publicity to gravel racing within the inventory market:

Appears just like the Unbound course profile:

I’ll hold all my cash in Chris King headsets.