The world of bikes certain does transfer quick! Take a pair weeks off as I simply did and earlier than you recognize it you’re completely misplaced. For instance, I fully missed the MADE (WHY ARE THEY YELLING?) bike present in Liberal Hellscape, OR:
Nevertheless, I’ve been doing my greatest to get caught up, and I feel the gist of it’s a bunch of individuals with thigh tattoos stood round exhibiting bikes designed to look 35 years previous, solely with irreverent and/or ironic model names like “Scorching Salad” and “Microwaved Fish.” Then individuals on the Web gushed about how superb they have been and mentioned stuff like, “The rim brake’s not useless!,” which makes me actually offended as a result of the rim brake is totally 100% useless, and the individuals who killed it are the exact same ones who go away Web feedback like “The rim brake’s not useless!” but in actual life have been the primary individuals to purchase “improvements” like 1x drivetrains and disc brakes and digital all the things and a derailleur you’ll be able to stand on for some cause:

[From here.]
Clearly I’ve underestimated the quantity of people that must cease mid-ride with the intention to change a lightbulb.
By the way in which, the total title of the present is the MADE Handmade Bike Present, and Stevil over at All Hail The Black Market provides some helpful perspective on that:

Although as somebody who strives for political correcteness I object to the slur “honky,” as a result of the right time period is “Fashionably Tattooed American.”
And sure, earlier than you get all indignant, I absolutely acknowledge the actual cause I’m cynical concerning the MADE present is as a result of I’m irrelevant and uncool and no one invited me.
One thing else I missed was the Roadini presale:

Although that doesn’t matter as a result of not solely does it seem there are nonetheless Roadinis obtainable, but additionally it seems I have already got a Roadini:

This was the bike I took with me on my trip, and it left me wanting for nothing, no matter whether or not I used to be using on paved roads…

…or unpaved roads surfaced with Very Small Rocks:

I imply certain, I did sometimes select to disregard an indication or two:

And consequently acquired in slightly over my head:

However again on New 12 months’s Even once I first assembled this bike, I did so with summer time trip maximization foremost in my thoughts, and I daresay I succeeded in that regard:

We’ve been adjourning to the identical location each summer time for the previous 10 years, and over that point I’ve introduced completely different bikes for various rides, however by way of sheer versatility I’m unsure any of them beats the Roadini:

Completely the Jones has taken me a lot deeper within the woods, however the older I get the extra I notice the foolhardiness of venturing deep into the woods on my own the place there’s no telephone reception and you may simply get harm or misplaced–and I imply correctly misplaced, like this man:

I don’t wanna be that man.
Talking of getting misplaced, we took slightly aspect journey whereas we have been away, and it seems in case you preserve heading north for a pair hours you wind up in a wholly completely different nation. Like, they converse one other language and all the things!

For this reason pedestrians ought to at all times put on helmets.
Additionally, you don’t solely have to fret about falling ice. You additionally must be looking out for falling underpants:

And in case you haven’t but discovered which metropolis that is, the reply is Paris, France:

I imply Berlin, Germany:

I imply…truthfully, I nonetheless don’t know the place we have been. All I do know is that they spoke French they usually ate bagels:

They certain wish to put bizarre shit on bagels:

Additionally, fashion-wise, they’re apparently nonetheless caught in 2007 when the city fixie was king:

Although out on the streets they’re using e-bikes identical to everybody else:
It was an pleasant journey, although I used to be completely happy to retreat to the wilderness as soon as once more:

I’ve acquired no scarcity of urbanity in my life.